


Take On Me (Take Roxanne First)

by Tori-Katherine (toria0928)



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: Banter, Epic Battles, F/M, Flirting, Good versus Evil, Kidnapping
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-26
Updated: 2014-05-26
Packaged: 2018-01-26 14:05:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1690988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toria0928/pseuds/Tori-Katherine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roxanne has been kidnapped by Megamind countless times. No, seriously, she's lost count. Since they discontinued the promotion she doesn't get her card punched and she has no idea if she's going on her twenty-six or her thirty-seventh. She knows it's somewhere in that range.</p>
<p>Snippets starting from Metro Man and Megamind's first public battle, mostly of all the times Roxanne got nabbed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take On Me (Take Roxanne First)

Once upon a time it was just the two of them.

At the very beginning of it all, it was just them. Just Megamind and Metro Man. Even before, in school, it was just them. And Minion, of course.

When their feud turned into a true ‘battle of good versus evil,’ it still only came down to them. Megamind was the only villain Metro Man had to defeat, and Metro Man was the only hero Megamind cared about destroying.

That changed after their first public battle.

They had both graduated from High School recently. People had heard of them but they were only children. Their rivalry mostly consisted of petty pranks and in-class banter. They were both clever and witty, so no one bored of watching their mischief.

Yet, Megamind was bored. He was bored of the feeble inventions to embarrass Metro Man. He wanted more. He wanted to bring their game to the next level.

One night, after weeks of Megamind slaving himself in his lab for long hours, a fatal crash was heard across Metro City. And then another. And another. Over and over until the city hall was shadowed in the silhouette of Megamind’s first gigantic robot.

Megamind stood atop a nearby building, a measly seeming remote in his hands and Minion at his side.

“Metro Man will rue the day he ever crossed me, Minion!”

“Of course, Sir.”

“Make my words, today will be the day I destroy Metro Man, once and for all.”

“I believe the expression is ‘mark my words.’”

“I like my way better.” Megamind declared, his eyes shining threateningly at the fish.

“As do I, Sir.” Minion seemed to shrug with his fins.

Megamind gave a menacing laugh, one that he had to admit needed work, and pulled out a microphone as Minion turned on some invisible sound system to project across Metro City.

“A-ahem,” Megamind began through the microphone, tapping it a few times. “Excuse me? Is this thing on?

“Hear me, citizens of Metrosity!” Megamind shouted, watching a few windows around town light up. “You may not know me, but trust me when I tell you… That is about to change. I am Megamind! Devilishly Handsome Master of All Villainy! I call upon the one calling himself Metro Man! You know who you are. I am at city hall, awaiting your doom. Oh, and I have a little surprise for you, old chum. I’m calling it… MegaSaurus! Robot of D—”

The Microphone flew about ten feet as Megamind was tossed back, hitting his huge head roughly on the cement roof. Rubble danced past and he didn’t even realize how earsplitting the crash was until he was left with the ringing silence. After a sufficient amount of coughing and dusting his wickedly suave, new, black cloak off, he looked upon the wreckage of his once beautiful invention.

“M-MegaSaurus?”

Minion stood, one arm of his new robotic body chunked off from the crash, but that was easily fixed. “Oh, Sir, I’m sorry—”

“MegaSaurus!” Megamind wailed as Metro Man rose from the dust clouds. “You dim-witted, overgrown pellet dispenser! You ruined my new toy!”

Metro Man, with his ever charming smile, landed at the edge of the building, his fist resting on his hips and not an ounce of sympathy in his tiny head. “Sorry, Blue, but you’ll have plenty of time to go through the stages of grief in prison, won’t you?”

“Oh, don’t get smart with me, Warren! I’m not Blue! Well, I am blue, but the name is Megamind, now! Megamind, Devilishly Handsome Master of All Villainy!”

Metro Man chuckled, shaking his head. “Well, I’ll leave you to work on your title with the Warden. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you again.”

“Yes, of course, we will all just go and have a little reunion party at my little old prison cell, won’t we? Well, guess what, Metro Man? The punch of justice has just run out!”

Megamind dashed for an exit, his attempt feeble but an attempt non-the-less, before Metro Man swooped in front of him, catching hold of his cape.

“Nonsense! Catering keeps extra batches in the back.” Metro Man winked down at the blue villain, turning to look at the fishy sidekick. “Minion, good seeing you.”

“Always a pleasure, Mr. Scott. How are your parents?”

“Vacationing in the Caribbean, actually.”

“Minion!” Megamind cried outrageously. “Whose side are you on?!”

“I’m sorry, Sir, but it’s only polite. They did send you such a nice Christmas present last year.”

“Yes, and I sent them a thank you card, so can we be done with it?!”

“Blue, there is always time for social customaries.”

“Why don’t you just take me to jail already?! I’m going to be late for my yoga class, anyway. I promised my uncles I won’t miss it again. If you think—”

“The dust is settling on this soon ended battle, but the results are unclear. Where the self-proclaimed ‘Megamind’ and ‘Metro Man’ are now is currently unknown. This is Roxanne Richi reporting live from the center of Metro City.”

Both Metro Man’s and Megamind’s eyes locked in on the figure on the street below. From the rooftop, Megamind couldn’t exactly see what this ‘Roxanne’ looked like, but he could hear her words well enough. The pair looked at each other again, their faces showing clearly their surprise.

“Is she reporting…”

“On us?” Megamind finished, looking again towards the obscure figure.

“Dibs!” Metro Man called, zooming away with Megamind in tow before he could argue—or find out what these ‘dibs’ were much less whether or not they were able to be stolen.

“Excuse me.” Metro Man gave his biggest, most dastardly charming grin to date as they approach the woman. She looked up with a start, her big ice-blue eyes locking in on the hero and his villain counterpart.

“Oh, you must be Metro Man?” She asked, her weight shifting to one hip as an eyebrow arched.

“That’s right, ma’am. I couldn’t help but overhear you, what with my super-hearing and all, and—”

“Could you hold on one moment? Hal, get the camera ready, we have our first interview.”

‘Hal,’ a squat and bulbous thing with fiery hair, looked from Roxanne’s excited gleam to Metro Man’s cocky smirk, before pulling Roxanne to what he believed vainly was out of hearing range. “I don’t know, Rox, I don’t like the look of this guy. What makes you think he’ll tell you anything? I mean, we could just, like, call it a day. A giant robot exploded, so what?”

“Hal, please, you know I have been trying to get my foot in the door for real stories at KMCP for ages. This could be my big break!”

“Alright, fine. But if he looks at you the wrong way I swear, I’ll… like, ruff him up. Because I did karate in middle school, and I totally got up to a black belt. Well, not all the way up, but I got close…”

Megamind rolled his eyes. “Warren Timothy Scott, I thought you were better than meaningless news interviews. Don’t you have to be getting back to bringing me to justice and all that? I mean, really, this is what I get for working with amateurs.”

“Your holding cell can wait five minutes, Blue. Don’t be melodramatic.”

“Excuse me, sir, but if there is anything I, Megamind, Devilishly Handsome Master of All Villainy, am, it is NOT ‘mel-ahdre-matic.’”

“Sure.”

“Sorry about that, Metro Man.” Roxanne smiled as she returned, a grumbling Hal behind her.

Hal set the camera on his shoulder and rolled his eyes. “Alright, alright, we go live in five, four, three, two…”

“Good evening, Metro City. This is Roxanne Richi reporting live at Town Hall for KMCP news. I have with me Metro Man himself. Metro Man, what exactly occurred here tonight?”

“Well, Ms. Richi, I was just making the usual patrols around the city, helping the elderly cross the road, getting cats out of trees, intercepting the occasional muggings, when my old time arch nemesis here, Megamind—” The hero held Megamind up by his collar in the least dignified way imaginable. “—decided it was time to play with his latest toy, the Meganasaurus.”

“Excuse me, ‘Metro Mahn,’ but his name was MegaSaurus.”

“So I swooped in like any impervious super hero would do and took out the robot before it became a problem.”

“Megamind, is it?” Roxanne asked, turning to the pouting, blue-faced villain. “What exactly were you planning on doing with the robot?”

Megamind looked into the ice-blue eyes of the reporter, caught up for a moment. In his outrage, of course. “Planning on doing? What kind of quest-ee-on is that? I was planning on destroying Metro Man, of course!”

“Destroying Metro Man? Isn’t that just murder?”

“Bah! The word ‘murder’ is so tacky and out-stated. But yes, I was going to murder him.”

“What were your plans after that?”

“After what?”

“After destroying Metro Man?”

Metro Man laughed, “I don’t think his plans go that far.”

“Psh, of course I had plans! Deliciously evil plans, of mass villainy and chaos! Of course, I wouldn’t want to give too much away, but trust me, it would have been very wicked indeed!”

“Right. Well, thank you so much for your time, Metro Man.”

“Thank you, Roxie. And thank you, citizens of Metro City!”

With that, Metro Man blasted off into the sky with enough force to give Megamind severe neck pains for days.

Megamind sat in holding, waiting for his escape plan to fully take place, when the very same Roxanne Richi appeared on his television.

“Ah, Ms. Richi, I do believe you have not seen the last of me.”

His maniacal laugh startled the Warden from his sleep on the other side of the compound, making him notice the falsely notarized form on his desk and setting into play the next devious plot.


End file.
